SNAKE!!!!

Green Mamba

SNAKE! Of course, that one word grabs everyone’s attention. On Saturday afternoon I was reclining on the sofa, at least the part my Zimbabwean Cattle Retriever – Crested dog, Roxie would allow me to enjoy. Then I heard my long-suffering wife call from outside, “John, come quickly!” So I did. She was looking over the edge of the front porch, pointing down into our flower garden. It was a SNAKE! It slithered back into the bushes.

I hate snakes.

Lisa went inside. I peeked over the railing and there it was again, enormous, farther out in the yard. SNAKE! My heart went pitty-pat. My body went to the out building for a shovel. I came back. It was still there. Defending my family and territory, I drove the shovel down and nearly cut it in half. Still, it slithered away around the courner when I pulled the shovel back. It’s guts were emerging, yet it was still alive.

I pursued but could not find it. I poked around with the shovel, wishing it had a longer handle, and the SNAKE emerged, weaving back and forth. I nailed it again, shouting ancient Irish epithets and channeling St. Patrick. It would not die, striking again and again at the shovel. Creepy.

Finally, I finished it off, separating the head from the body, then went inside to Google its identity. I knew if it had been a black snake I would have left it alone, even though I think I mentioned that I hate snakes.

It is dead now, dumped on the dry bird feeder so our friend Mike, an expert, can identify what I killed. Lisa is sad. She is more of a naturalist than I. Google confirmed my suspicions that it was either a King Cobra or a Green Mamba. Mike’s coming over tomorrow after church. He’ll know.

Stay tuned, dear reader.

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4 Responses to SNAKE!!!!

  1. leahyetter says:

    I just shot my first bull snake of the season yesterday. He was trying to eat my chicken eggs. It was not a happy moment for me however. I wish we could all live in harmony but all that snake is going to do is stick around and scare the heck out of me every time I turn the corner. I hate them too. You did the right thing. 🙂

  2. craig says:

    Should have kept the old Stevens!

  3. Erin says:

    the suspense…..

  4. Thankfully, neither of you panicked! A woman in Bowie County, Texas, saw a snake in her yard, threw gasoline on it, and then set the snake on fire. The snake crawled into the brush and the brush caught her house on fire and it burned down. From World Magazine April 20. 2013.

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